Happy New Year?

Don't mean to fish for sympathy, but I spent New Years Eve alone. Followed by a break up. So my New Years was pretty awesome - full of tears and wallowing and self-pity. But at least it's a new start, right?

I do have my friends, however, to thank. They have all been very supportive and have patiently listened and cared for me even though I must have been frustrating at times, making the same mistakes over and over again. I sometimes am just helpless when it comes to boy troubles, and I fear that I am going to make those same mistakes I did years ago... And to be honest, I am a bit tired of it all. All I really yearn for is stability, and I guess for now the only certain thing that I know is stable is myself and my friends around me. And my family too. :D

2010 had a lot happening, however I don't know whether it went anywhere for me. It was lots of fun, however. Sad that I didn't do as much knitting as I wanted, and I haven't destashed all the excess yarn I want to get rid of, so I hope that on the knitting front I'll be able to accomplish a whole heap of things this year.

Why I say 2010 had a lot happening but didn't go anywhere? Well, I did a lot of theatre projects. Even though it may have built up my repertoire and experience and such, and it was immense fun, because they were mostly university student/amateur productions, it wasn't necessarily paving me a way into the industry. However, I got to meet heaps of new people and got to just have lots and lots of fun.

In a sense I sound a bit bitter when I say 2010 didn't go anywhere for me. I don't mean it to sound like that, but when I do reflect on it, it kinda felt that way. Which means that I hope 2011 will be a very productive and "moving forward" (to quasi borrow the words from our PM) type of year. I hope career wise I will be able to start my own business and do something for myself (I have always wanted to work for myself, be my own boss), I hope to finish knitting projects (I've joined a sock club just so I can), and I will continue to be surrounded by loving family and friends.

I always start the year by saying I should concentrate on myself more. Then I drift and start being dependent on certain people, or worry about certain people, or just be damn lazy and unmotivated. I say a lot of things, and I'm sure everybody does too, however I'm not totally great at fulfilling them. But I'll give it another try, and see how things go. I am a bit of a thinker, and sometimes my thoughts get carried away and weigh my heart down, so let's see if I can distract myself and focus on getting things done.

Here's to a new year. Let's hope all the tears I had for 1/1/11 are the only tears for the year, and it can only get better from here.

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